Well, that didn't work.
It's been months since my last post and I've gained everything back again. I'm just that kind of smart. But I do feel lucky because while I have regained (and even gained a little), I only gained five pounds more than my original highest weight back in 2012. I feel super lucky.
Unfortunately, I'm thinking of putting this back on LJ. I have one just sitting there and I have a friend that I feel I need to support with posts. So, I'll see you on my personal blog, revulo.livejournal.com. Bye!
Thursday, October 16, 2014
Monday, June 23, 2014
episode 022: irritated
I come in to work early and what do I find? The big, two liter bottle of water I left to drink today is gone. Poof. Grr. Now, I hate slow eaters (people that take like...a MONTH to eat something in the fridge), but this wasn't slow eating! Subtracting the weekend, I only left it for one day! What the hell!?
I'm trying not to be as irritated as I feel, because my co-worker is nice and has given me PLENTY of stuff. Just...dammit, I didn't want to have to make multiple trips to the water fountain today. Grr, whatever. Shake it off, Robyn.
I'm trying not to be as irritated as I feel, because my co-worker is nice and has given me PLENTY of stuff. Just...dammit, I didn't want to have to make multiple trips to the water fountain today. Grr, whatever. Shake it off, Robyn.
Saturday, June 21, 2014
episode 021: flush
This post is a bit TMI, just so you know.
As I promised myself, I'm back on the water. I've been taking it slow--I haven't completely cut out juice, but I have stopped soda (yes, I know juice can be just as bad as soda, gimme a break). I've been drinking one liter of water, but I want to increase it a little. Maybe by half a liter today. EDIT: And I DID.
I'm just amazed that this little bit of water is managing to flush me out. Pee, crap, pee, crap, pee, pee, pee, crap, that is my day. And there is a lot to go, I imagine.
And no...as much as I dream this to be true, my ankles are not 'normal' yet. I'll get there.
As I promised myself, I'm back on the water. I've been taking it slow--I haven't completely cut out juice, but I have stopped soda (yes, I know juice can be just as bad as soda, gimme a break). I've been drinking one liter of water, but I want to increase it a little. Maybe by half a liter today. EDIT: And I DID.
I'm just amazed that this little bit of water is managing to flush me out. Pee, crap, pee, crap, pee, pee, pee, crap, that is my day. And there is a lot to go, I imagine.
And no...as much as I dream this to be true, my ankles are not 'normal' yet. I'll get there.
episode 020: shame
I think that hurts the most about regain is the shame. You were already hurting because of being so big in the first place, but this is so much worse.
The thing that I'm most ashamed of in this second regain is not my ankles swelling so badly again (though that would be a close second. It's the fact that I've had to abandon my computer room. I do a LOT in there. I conlang (make constructed languages) and a lot of my stuff is on the computer. Oh yeah, I haven't STOPPED, but I've been forced to rely almost solely on my laptop for my creative stuff because I can't be comfortable in there.
Last year, I bought a smaller desk to be a little more ergonomic. And I just needed a new one. I loved it SO MUCH. But now I can't use it because I've gotten to big for it and my computer chair. (Sure, I can FIT, but the sides pinch me and it effing HURTS.)
I want to go back to the days where I didn't HAVE to use the laptop all the time at home. Well, because of my size, anyway. It's an old comp and sound can be finicky. Boo.
EDIT: This was written and meant to be posted two days ago. WTF, Blogger?
The thing that I'm most ashamed of in this second regain is not my ankles swelling so badly again (though that would be a close second. It's the fact that I've had to abandon my computer room. I do a LOT in there. I conlang (make constructed languages) and a lot of my stuff is on the computer. Oh yeah, I haven't STOPPED, but I've been forced to rely almost solely on my laptop for my creative stuff because I can't be comfortable in there.
Last year, I bought a smaller desk to be a little more ergonomic. And I just needed a new one. I loved it SO MUCH. But now I can't use it because I've gotten to big for it and my computer chair. (Sure, I can FIT, but the sides pinch me and it effing HURTS.)
I want to go back to the days where I didn't HAVE to use the laptop all the time at home. Well, because of my size, anyway. It's an old comp and sound can be finicky. Boo.
EDIT: This was written and meant to be posted two days ago. WTF, Blogger?
Wednesday, June 18, 2014
episode 019: last days
Today was the last day of school.
Not for the teachers, but I don't even care. The kids are gone. THE KIDS ARE GONE, HOLY FUCK, THE KIDS ARE GONE. I wasn't kidding when (if?) I mentioned that this year had been challenging. So when I JUMPED back off the wagon in February, I was really stressed out. Me and the classroom teacher I was with couldn't get it together, we both blew the fuck up health-wise. There was just SO much we had to deal with...
But I made a deal with myself. As soon as the kids are gone, I'm getting back on this ride. I allowed the kids to freak out my mind and rob me of my health for months, it isn't fair.
Slowly.
I'm going back on my water tomorrow, I think I'll modify my eating in a week or so. Also...I'm scared to get on the scale. I don't think I will for a while. I REALLY blew up. I won't be able to go back to the elaborate rewards system I set up for a while. BUT! One step at a time.
Not for the teachers, but I don't even care. The kids are gone. THE KIDS ARE GONE, HOLY FUCK, THE KIDS ARE GONE. I wasn't kidding when (if?) I mentioned that this year had been challenging. So when I JUMPED back off the wagon in February, I was really stressed out. Me and the classroom teacher I was with couldn't get it together, we both blew the fuck up health-wise. There was just SO much we had to deal with...
But I made a deal with myself. As soon as the kids are gone, I'm getting back on this ride. I allowed the kids to freak out my mind and rob me of my health for months, it isn't fair.
Slowly.
I'm going back on my water tomorrow, I think I'll modify my eating in a week or so. Also...I'm scared to get on the scale. I don't think I will for a while. I REALLY blew up. I won't be able to go back to the elaborate rewards system I set up for a while. BUT! One step at a time.
Saturday, February 1, 2014
episode 018: february 1, 2014
Height: 5’4” 
Highest weight: 378lbs
Starting weight: 362lbs (regain)
Current weight: 337
Total burned: 41lbs
Highest BMI: 64.9
Current BMI: 57.8
Pants/skirt size: 26/28
I think I can slow down. I want to do this in a healthy way, and nine pounds in a week is scary.
Highest weight: 378lbs
Starting weight: 362lbs (regain)
Current weight: 337
Total burned: 41lbs
Highest BMI: 64.9
Current BMI: 57.8
Pants/skirt size: 26/28
I think I can slow down. I want to do this in a healthy way, and nine pounds in a week is scary.
Thursday, January 30, 2014
episode 017: blast! foiled again!
There was a snow day AND my TOM arrived yesterday. Not a great combination. Thank goodness I only gained a few ounces.
I don't have much to report other than that. I hit my second mini-goal the other day, but I was finally able to record it on the big chart today. So yay! That's two buttons I can order.
I'm thinking of getting my first tattoo over my ankle. I'm just so proud of my ankles that I might as well.
I don't have much to report other than that. I hit my second mini-goal the other day, but I was finally able to record it on the big chart today. So yay! That's two buttons I can order.
I'm thinking of getting my first tattoo over my ankle. I'm just so proud of my ankles that I might as well.
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